life of uncertainty

I came home the other night to find my back patio doors wide open. My instant reaction was one of fear as I never open the screen door. I immediately called Scott and checked the closets and behind doorways. Nothing was amiss. After sleeping on it and discussing with Scott I realize that Elijah possibly opened those doors at a time while I was down doing laundry or such. At Scott's the balcony is large and comfortable and has a very high fence. It is also completely visible from the living room and kitchen. My balcony on the other hand is older for one, wide iron railing, short, narrow and mostly invisible from the living room. It is strange adjusting to having an older child. He is less likely to put foreign objects in his mouth or scout out cupboards but he would think nothing of climbing on a chair to pull something off the fireplace. A whole new world of dangers. The last two weeks Elijah has finally been expressing interest in potty training and is being very successful. As promised his father is helping him learn to ride a bike. It is quite cute, the helmets, knee pads and such. While I have mentioned some of the positive changes I have made in my life since returning from vacation I have some disturbing shifts in the other direction. I have been totally negligent about E's bedtime. It has shifted from 10 to 11 and later. Even when I get him in bed on time, between the water, the reading, the singing it has been near midnight before he is asleep. And his reasoning that he shouldn't have to go to bed as it is still light out doesn't help either :) He does not have a screen in his bedroom window so it is never open for fresh air as there are many wasps nest near by. He has been essentially sleeping in bed with me for a month and I know that has to stop.